The Panini Generation…Coming in Hot!
Today’s Sandwich Generation is Feeling the Pressure
Most of us know about the “sandwich generation” – young adults who are “caught in the middle” between caring for their aging parents and raising their children. More than 11 million Americans are feeling this squeeze. But since the pandemic, the sandwich generation has been growing faster than ever, with record numbers of older children moving back home and elderly parents needing new forms of care.
Millennials now make up more than one-third of family caregivers in the US. And as the average life expectancy continues to rise and couples wait longer to have kids, the pressure is only getting hotter and heavier on this sandwich – like two piping hot grill plates. Meet the panini generation.
Why is the panini generation so stressed out?
These tightly sandwiched Americans, who juggle family caregiving responsibilities on both ends, are pressed for money and time. According to a Home Instead, Inc. survey:
Nearly half (45%) of panini generation caregivers have cut expenses or shifted budgets in order to meet responsibilities as a caregiver for parent(s) and/or in-law(s).
Almost one in four of all respondents (23%) have quit a job that made it too hard to be a caregiver.
Roughly half (48%) of those who work say their employer has warned them that their caregiving responsibilities are jeopardizing their employment.
Many non-working caregivers left the workforce (60%), declined job offers (59%), and felt the quality of their life has suffered because of the time they invest in being a good caregiver (58%).
When asked how the pandemic has impacted their ability to juggle caregiving responsibilities, nearly half (44%) of the panini generation say it has made it harder to handle. They are concerned about the impact of COVID on their aging parent/in-law (67%) and children (57%), finances (54%), their mental health (54%), and having child care challenges (41%).
Caregiving expenses have also risen during the pandemic, with caring for an aging relative now averaging about $1,000 per month and with nearly one-in-four spending at least $200 more than usual each month. This is partly due to inflation as well as the loss of health insurance benefits for those who are unemployed.
How do we reduce the squeeze?
It’s important for the panini generation to speak up and voice their needs. It’s also equally important for loved ones, employers, and others in their network to offer support.
If you’re in the panini generation:
Ask for help. Reach out to other parents for carpooling or to pick up your kids from after-school activities.
Create your own home space. Not every part of the house needs to be dedicated to caregiving. Give your kids and/or your parents their space while you have your own space to unwind with TV, yoga or a book.
Join a support group. Remember, you’re not alone in this. There are many online support groups, including us in The Caregiving Crew. Sometimes all you need is to vent to someone else who gets it.
Hire short-term, affordable care. Companies like Care.com offer professional care services for your loved ones and allow you to spend time on other things. These professionals are trained specifically in elder care and can help out with a variety of tasks such as bathing, cooking, and driving to appointments. Many states also offer free transportation for senior citizens, such as this program, so be sure to search online for your local government programs. Reach out to your loved one’s health insurance representative to inquire if they can cover any of the costs.
Sync with your employer. If you’re employed, it’s a good idea to inform your boss or colleagues about your situation and caregiving needs. Being transparent can ease your stress and help others understand the work flexibility you need in order to offer your best self. You may also be eligible for Employee Assistance Program (EAP) benefits that could help manage your stress.
Home Instead, the world’s largest home care franchise company, is working at the national level to advocate for solutions for aging adults and their families through initiatives such as Moving Health Home and the RAISE Family Caregiving Advisory Council. Click here to check out other practical information and resources offered by Home Instead for families and employers.
What about spending quality time with my parents?
The panini generation often feels stressed that their parents are getting older and that they’re missing out on quality time, while most of their attention is focused on their kids. Just imagine this – your parents, who are in their 70s, came down to visit you for the weekend. But you also have two toddlers to take care of. How do you make sure your kids don’t get bored without neglecting your parents?
Well, we came up with a list of activities that allow you to spend time with your elderly parents while also having your kids around. Or perhaps these can be activities for just the grandparents and grandchildren while you take a break. :)
21 Activities to Help the Panini Generation Maximize Time with Their Aging Parents While Raising Children:
For the creative…
Draw portraits of each other (and frame them later)
Bake cookies (perhaps a family recipe)
Color & paint together
Put on a talent show (sing, dance, make music, or crack jokes!)
Partake in seasonal arts & crafts (e.g., carve pumpkins, make ornaments)
For the playful…
Play cards (Uno, Go Fish, & Old Maid are classics)
Work a puzzle (a great way to keep the mind moving for all ages!)
Build with legos (or anything similar)
Play board games or charades
For the sentimental…
Draw a family tree
Tell family stories
Share old photo albums
Capture new family photos
For the introverts…
Go on a walk
Plant flowers (or other gardening activities)
Knit scarves
Visit a museum
For the active…
Play mini golf
Practice beginner yoga (basic poses)
Play Simon Says
Watch a sporting event (live or on TV)
If you’re thinking…wait, this all doesn’t apply to me yet. My parents are young and healthy and/or I don’t have any kids! Well first off, thank you for reading all the way through to the end of this post. :) Sooner or later, your parents will need your help and that may end up coinciding with when you start raising kids or are still doing so. So it doesn’t hurt to start mentally preparing today. Save this post, be sure to subscribe to The Caregiving Crew, and do what you can to prevent burnout!
This post hit home! Thank you for the comic relief! Here's to the paninis! We are not alone.